Sidekick Arsonist Caught

Masked hero sidekick from Cherry City, Icarus.

Icarus yelled that he wanted to “stop Amazonian rule” after authorities arrested him in connection with 2 arson cases in Rose City. This former hero sidekick has turned to the dark side.

Icarus (whose real name is withheld), must serve 5 years at the State Hospital for the Insane.

Prosecutors had implored Rose City Superior Court to sentence Icarus to more than 30 years in prison based on his conviction for setting the fires, noting that he had shown no remorse.

“After he was taken to jail, he said, ‘Feminism is evil’ ” Deputy Dist. Attorney, James Falcon said. Besides the property damage, Falcon said, Icarus scarred many people’s lives for years to come. None of the blazes resulted in injuries.

Icarus sat in a wheelchair motionless, looking straight ahead, and showed no reaction as the judge handed down the sentence. Before sentencing, his attorney Steven Schrödinger told the judge that Icarus had turned down a deal offered by prosecutors for a 1-year prison term.

He began setting the fires after networking with individuals online calling themselves “The Bridge City Beta Males.” The fires were set during the night, putting residents on edge. Residents turned to social media to get updates on the fires, with some peering out windows into the dark, keeping porch and garage lights on, and fixating on sirens in the distance.

Police initially were stumped. Finally, a police officer spotted Icarus tied up in front of a local burlesque bar in the Hawthorne District. In a tent on the roof of the establishment was found fire starter sticks and explosives, police said. Icarus was arrested in the early morning hours. Police later retrieved videos of Icarus doing push-ups inside the burning buildings.

Man steals 157 plants

ROSE CITY — A man was arrested for allegedly stealing plants and other items from the garden center at a Vantucky Grocery Store over the past few weeks.

Tom Aladdin, 41, was arrested after detectives searched his home on NE 125th Avenue and found 157 stolen plants, a garden cart, a display rack and Brie cheese.  

The grocery store prevention staff began investigating Aladdin and gave information to Vantucky Police.

The value of the stolen property is estimated at $6,000.

Aladdin in charged with Possession of Stolen Property II, Theft with Intent to Resell, Trafficking Stolen Property 1, and Possession of a Controlled Substance- Brie cheese.

Coffee Shop victim of Arson

Rose City – Another explosion took place Friday night on Powell Blvd. The Spritely Bean, a coffee shop, was the victim of arson committed by the self-proclaimed Bridge City Beta Males.

A thunderous explosions shook the area, sending large black smoke plumes and debris billowing into the air.

Witnesses report hearing a deafening boom, feeling buildings shake, lights go out. Some thought it was an earthquake.

“I did time in Iraq. This was just like a bomb going off,” said one witness.

“You could almost feel the noise, that’s how loud it was,” said another witness in the area. “It’s hard to talk about. Glass shattered, everything exploded. … It was indescribable.”

Large smoke plumes were visible from blocks away. Local residents were warned to avoid the area if possible.

The explosion, just after 10 p.m., were in a row of businesses that also houses Steakadelphia, and a scientologist print shop, which is a total loss. The owner of Steakadelphia told the Rose Cityian that all his employees are accounted for.

No fatalities have been reported.

Crews are asking residents to stay away from the area. Power and gas have been cut in the area.

Police are asking for tips on the whereabouts of the Beta Males. They have yet to find members of this rogue band of arsonists.

Bookstore Arson on Hawthorne

ROSE CITY – Investigators believe arson was the caused a fire at a Woman’s Empowerment Bookstore Friday night. 

According to police, officers responded to a burglar alarm at the bookstore located on Hawthorne by 37th AVE around 10:38 p.m.

About eight minutes later, the fire alarm sounded. Firefighters responded and fought the fire at the business.

Through the course of their investigation, it was determined that someone slid an explosive device through the mail slot.

No one was in the building at the time and there are no reported injuries.

So far, no arrests have been made.

A note left by the bookstore claims a group called “The Bridge City Beta Males” were responsible for the arson. At this time investigators have not released any details of the fire.

Masked Man steals jewelry from Rose City store

The Yellow SkullROSE CITY, USA. – A bold heist was caught on camera at a local jewellery store and police hope the security video will lead them to the crook.

The theft happened just before 2 p.m. Monday at Margulis Jewelers on Broadway in Rose City. The manager had left for coffee, leaving a female clerk alone in the store, and that’s when a bold masked robber went to work. A man walked into the jewellery store and asked the clerk to see a necklace in a window display at the front of the store.

“He said he loved one of the necklaces that were in the window and asked to see it,” said Joan Durham, the clerk. “He says ‘can you show it to me – I just want to see how much the damage is going to be.’ ”

But when Durham went to get the necklace, the masked man jumped over the counter towards the back of the store where a visible safe was open and grabbed a bag with $1,500,000 worth of diamonds in it. He then sprinted out of the store before Durham could do anything. The whole thing happened in just seconds and the guy was gone.

“My heart was pounding for quite some time because I was so angry and I had a lot of adrenaline rushing through me,” Durham said. “I wanted to go get him.”

“This person clearly knew what they were doing and what they were looking for,” said Det. William Rail with the Rose City Police Department.

The suspect is described as a white male between 40 and 50 years old, who is about 6 feet tall and weighs around 260 pounds. He was wearing a purple shirt, orange gloves, blue khaki jeans and yellow skull mask with orange hood. If you recognize him or have other information that could help in the case, call the police.

Tolkian Banned

Do not approach. This individual is highly unstable.

For crimes against women and humanity, Tolkian is banned from the Real Life Superhero community.

Tolkian has had a history of mental instability. The culmination of his imbalance lead to a young woman in the hospital and in a shelter.

If any comes into contact with Tolkian, proceed with caution. Tolkian is dangerous. Contact your local authorities or a nearby superhero with powers.

Yellow Skull on the loose

The Yellow Skull

The Costumed Crazies Police Division (CCPD) is asking for the public’s help in identifying a suspect who robbed Petersons on 9th and Morrison in Downtown Rose City.

The suspect appears to be a male in his 30s to 40s, wearing a dark blue T-shirt with a yellow skull, purple pants, wearing a yellow skull, purple pants, wearing a yellow skull mask, and an orange hood. The suspect is carrying a duffle bag filled with honey.

Anyone with information about this suspect is asked to contact Port of Rose City Police Detective. William Rail at 503-867-5309, police@rose-city.net.

Pizza Robbers Burgle Local Eateries

Suspect in question

By Beef Wellington

ROSE CITY- Rose City Police are seeking a man and woman suspected of robbing several pizza eateries in the Old Town District.

The latest robbery took place at the Old Town Pizza on NW Davis. around 2:35 p.m. where the couple entered and made off with dozens of pizzas.

The male suspect is described as a man in his early 20s, between 5 feet, 7 inches and to 8 inches, with a medium build, short brown hair, sunglasses, and in a gray steamer suit with a cape. The woman suspect is described as a woman in his early 20s, between 5 feet, 4 inches to 6 inches, with a thin build, black hair, sunglasses, in a black swat vest, and black combat pants and boots.

Anyone with information about these series of robberies is asked to contact Det. William Rail at 503-867-5309, will.rail@rose-city.net; or to contact the Rose City office of the FBI at 503-555-6792. 

Naked Man stops attempted robbery

A Totally Naked Man
Picture of the man in question

By Bill “The Mouse” Bailey 

ROSE CITY- A naked man stopped a robbery in Downtown Rose City on Friday Night.

An officer first spotted the orange-haired man, without his clothes, running toward a robbery in progress at Pioneer Courthouse Square around 6 pm. The individual stopped a would be the robber, Jason Grumblebum, as he attempted to steal money from a couple at gunpoint.

After the naked man beat down Mr. Grumblebum, he ran off down the street, singing a Laura Branigan song. The officer tried using a stun gun to subdue the naked man but the stun gun malfunction. 

The robber, Mr. Grumble, was taken into custody for the attempted robbery.

This is not the first time a totally naked man was found stopping criminal activity in Rose City. The police have cited the man with disorderly conduct and interfering with a peace officer but have yet to discover the identity of the nude crime stopper. 

Hero Arrested!

ROSE CITY — The man exposed as The Black Knight, Real Life Superhero, has been arrested.

Joshua Stone was booked into the Multnomah County jail Tuesday night. Rose City Police arrested Stone for stalking, which is a misdemeanor crime.

According to prosecutors, the Multnomah County District Attorney’s office decided not to file charges at this time. They can reconsider later.

Stone has been released from jail.

“There was not enough evidence to proceed with the incidents of stalking that were reported to us,” explained Matthew Hall, a deputy district attorney in Multnomah County.

Stone is also trying to change his name. He filed court papers in Yamhill County on Tuesday, requesting that a judge allow him to legally change his name from Joshua Stone to Maxwell P. Gigglebottoms.

A hearing has been scheduled for February 15 to consider the change.

Stone claimed he was a Real Life Superhero; a member of the team, The Alternates. The Alternates released Stone after the arrest and disbanded the team.

The U.S. Department of Defense, in coordination with the Rose City Costumed Crazies Division, are investigating the matter.